Here I am. for the first time, true, and yet, God how much I have pictured myself in this situation! writing with no ideas in this head. no ink in this heart of mine. maybe it's the idea that someone else might read these thoughts that freezes me. someone else like him.. Midnight will be here soon. I'm sitting alone in this room, thinking again and again. thinking about forgetting.. I feel so silly to be trapped in this weird net of disturbing feelings. I should forget, but not today, definitely not tonight, let it be starting from tomorrow, like some harsh diet that no one seems capable of sticking to. What does it mean to let go that what is most precious to your heart? cowardness? maybe. If this were true, then I'm guilty in the eyes of love. We are. and most importantly, I'm guilty towards myself, my memories, my laughs and tears, towards the Truth, the Greater Good, as I stupidly call it sometimes, and the world itself. I ask all that I have just mentionned to forgive me, for I have commited the Greater Sin, but can I ever forgive myself, some day? It is already past midnight. I don't feel like sleeping, though. maybe I should work on the forgetting part. yeah, I should go and remember to forget. Good luck girl, "you're gonna need it!" |
"I should go and remember to forget."
wow. The contrast is so poerful.
Otherwise, a pwerful text.
When you read it back, I wish you are in a more harmony with what happened.
are you?